40 Promises for Marriage

Paul Newman

My former boss, the longtime (now retired) Managing Editor of Vogue magazine, picked up a business card while at dinner at Hyman’s Seafood in downtown Charleston during my wedding weekend. She presented it to me after I returned from my honeymoon, half as a joke, half in an attempt to fulfill her ongoing role as life coach. I can’t say I come close to following this advice to the letter, but I keep the card on my desk to this day and refer to it from time to time. They’re good goals to try and live by.

  1. Start each day with a kiss.
  2. Wear your wedding day at all times.
  3. Date once a week.
  4. Accept differences.
  5. Be polite.
  6. Gift gifts.
  7. Smile often.
  8. Touch.
  9. Give back rubs.
  10. Laugh together
  11. Send a card for no reason.
  12. Do what the other person wants before he or she asks.
  13. Listen.
  14. Encourage.
  15. Know his or her needs.
  16. Fix the other person’s breakfast.
  17. Compliment twice a day.
  18. Call during the day.
  19. Slow down.
  20. Hold hands.
  21. Cuddle.
  22. Ask for other’s opinion.
  23. Show respect.
  24. Look your best.
  25. Celebrate birthdays in a big way.
  26. Apologize.
  27. Forgive.
  28. Set up a romantic getaway.
  29. Be positive.
  30. Be kind.
  31. Be vulnerable.
  32. Respond quickly to the other person’s request.
  33. Reminisce about your favorite times together.
  34. Treat each other’s friends and relatives with courtesy.
  35. Send flowers every Valentine’s Day and anniversary.
  36. Admit when wrong.
  37. Be sensitive to each other’s sexual desires.
  38. Pray for each other daily.
  39. Say “I love you” frequently.
  40. Seek outside help when needed.