‘Tis the season for Christmas cocktails, festive fêtes, cookie exchanges, brunches with Santa, Hanukkah meals with the in-laws—the list goes on. Just glance at your calendar! If you’re not hosting this time of year, you’re RSVP-ing. Ahead of holiday events, we’re thinking about how we can refine our skills and perfect the art of entertaining from both our roles as guests and hosts.

Naturally, we turned to our favorite planners for advice because a dinner party is a party! These Over The Moon Directory Planners share not only their hosting tips and tricks but also their guest suggestions and recommendations and, perhaps even more helpful, their pet peeves!

For The Host

We all want to make entertaining seem effortless when in reality, it’s rarely ever that. But with a little foresight and planning ahead of time, you can make your guests think otherwise.

What is your ultimate holiday hosting tip?

• “Have someone in charge of the coat room and an official place to put coats.” – Marcy Blum
• “My favorite hosting ‘luxury’ is an arrival landing zone—somewhere guests can set down bags/phones, find a charger, and immediately feel settled.” – Emily Campbell of GoBella Design & Planning
• “I always recommend preparing as much as possible in advance—set the table a day or two early, organize the bar, and finalize the flow of the evening—so that when your guests arrive, you can truly enjoy the celebration alongside everyone else.” – Allison Jackson of Pineapple Productions
• “Have some music playing softly in the background. We also love the look of a candle flame, perhaps it’s a scented candle again with a seasonal fragrance or even a lit fireplace if your home has one.” – Mother-daughter planning duo Victoria and Amanda Dubin of Victoria Dubin Events
• “At dinner parties, I always find the moment to make a heartfelt toast to acknowledge each and every person. Sometimes I write a small note and tuck it under the plate or at their setting to be discovered.” – Michelle Rago
• “Always plan on one or more guests showing up right on time or early! Make a bulk welcome cocktail you can pour for guests and serve upon arrival, give them time to settle in, and say their hellos while having a drink in their hand!” – Ann Travis of Ann Travis Events
• “Prep everything so the only thing you’re juggling when guests arrive is a cocktail shaker. I always set the table the night before, light candles early, and get the music going before the doorbell even rings.” – Elizabeth Slossberg of EKS Events
• “My ultimate hosting tip is to arrange for serving or clean up help so you can stay out of the kitchen and enjoy the celebration. If hiring help isn’t an option, invite your closest friends or family members to take on small tasks. This way, you’ll stay connected with your guests while keeping everything running smoothly.” – Leslie Price of In Any Event
• “Begin by setting the tone from the moment guests walk in: warm lighting, a signature scent that subtly hints at the season, and music that gently wraps the room in ease. When the lighting, scent, and music are intentional, guests feel cared for before you even say hello. Prepare a non-alcoholic welcome drink alongside a cocktail, something seasonal but elegant, like a spiced pear spritz, to immediately make guests feel seen, regardless of preferences. Most importantly, pace your evening with intention. Allow conversations and courses to unfold naturally rather than rushing. When a guest leaves saying, ‘I felt so taken care of,’ you know you’ve succeeded.” – Lorie Lau of H&L Lovely Creations

What are hosting essentials that hosts should never forget?

• “Always have enough toilet paper, ice cubes, and hangers.” – Marcy Blum
  
• “Mood lighting, a ready-to-go drink plan, and places to park a glass. Nail those three and the night is already halfway to wonderful. Everything else is just layering on personality.” – Emily Coyne of Emily Coyne Events
• “Keep the bar open, and the wine flowing. Nothing makes a guest more uncomfortable than having to ask for a refill. In addition to a fully stocked bar, I strategically place wine buckets that are fully accessible, ensuring guests can refill at their own pace.” – Michelle Rago
• “A tiny detail guests always notice: a bathroom ‘reset’ basket—mints, stain stick, lint roller, matches, hand cream, and fresh towels. It makes people feel genuinely cared for.” – Emily Campbell
• “Know your guests’ food allergies and or aversions. While most guests know to have proper etiquette if they don’t eat what you are serving, it’s super gracious and nice to ask in advance if there is anything particular they cannot enjoy, or even better: something they really would enjoy.” – Victoria Dubin and Amanda Dubin
• “Always remember the functional details that support the beauty of an event. Extra glassware, plenty of ice, a well-organized bar, fresh hand towels, and a designated spot for coats and bags all ensure that your evening flows smoothly. When the logistics are quietly in place, your design elements—flowers, linens, candlelight—can truly shine.” – Allison Jackson
• “Lighting is everything. Dim the overheads, more candles than you think, and you’re halfway there. A self-serve bar setup is a lifesaver; it frees you up and makes guests feel at home. And don’t forget the little details: fresh hand towels, extra napkins, and whatever you need to avoid sprinting to the pantry mid-dinner.” – Elizabeth Slossberg
• “When serving family style, always have a little extra so no one feels awkward about reaching for the last bite. Also be sure to keep the bathroom stocked with toilet paper, hand towels, liquid soap, and mints.” – Leslie Price
• “Take-away gift baggies! Always the most thoughtful and fun gesture to give your guests on the way out. These can be as simple as homemade peanut brittle with special packaging or a small scented candle, Bonus points if you leave a note inside the package thanking the guest for coming.” – Ann Travis

What do you do to make guests feel at home?

• “Introduce them to each other!” – Marcy Blum
• “I like to keep it easy and light-hearted. I don’t require shoes to be removed. If something breaks, it breaks. If something spills, I quietly clean it up. No fuss, no muss. I never want my home to feel like a museum.” – Michelle Rago
• “Set the mood! Music in the background, appetizers, offer to take their jackets. Don’t ever tell anyone to take their shoes off! Hah!” – Ann Travis
• “Allow everyone the freedom to ‘make themselves at home’ with a coffee corner, espresso martini corner, or a gin and tonic station. It’s a subtle way of saying ‘Please make yourself at home’ without having to actively host all the time.” – Alice Wilkes of Alice Wilkes Design
• “I try to practice intuitive hospitality—anticipating comfort before it’s needed. A warm greeting at the door, a natural place to set down belongings, soft lighting that draws people inward, and an immediate offer of a drink or small bite all signal: You are welcome here. Beyond that, clear pathways and thoughtfully arranged seating help guests feel both cared for and free to move about with ease.” – Allison Jackson
• “I pay attention to the senses. Music that fits the mood, a gorgeous but subtle scent like pine, cedar, or something seasonal. A beverage served or something warm or an appetizer being served within minutes of guests arriving. I also love a small personal touch: place cards for dinner, or a little welcome note for overnight guests. It makes people feel considered.” – Elizabeth Slossberg
• “I welcome them with a drink right off the bat, introduce them to new friends, and offer information they have in common to initiate the conversation.” – Emily Campbell
• “First impressions set the tone. If you’ve been cooking all day, the house should already smell delicious. Add soft lighting, background music that’s upbeat but not overpowering, and a designated spot for coats and bags so guests feel instantly settled.” – Leslie Price
• “I’m also intentional about conversation architecture. I introduce guests with context, sharing something they have in common or a story that draws them in, so connection feels organic rather than forced.” – Lorie Lau
• “Whenever I host a gathering, I love encouraging guests to flow through different parts of the house, not only the dining room. Keeping the evening dynamic creates a sense of discovery and makes the experience feel more intimate and alive.” – Marianna Idirin of Marianna Idirin Events

For The Guest

Follow this advice or, in some instances, avoid being a cautionary tale if you want to get an invitation back next year.

What are some of the biggest guest faux pas?

• “Anything past 30 minutes late is no longer ‘fashionable,’ it’s unacceptable!” – Carly Carey of Apricity Event Co.
• “Changing up the hosts place cards! Leave them, they more than likely seated you there for a reason. And, hey, you might make a new friend out of it! – Ann Travis
• “Camping out in the kitchen. It’s the host’s command center, not the cocktail hour. The best guests move with the flow of the evening rather than disrupting it.” – Emily Coyne
• “Arriving empty-handed. Treating the home like a venue instead of someone’s curated sanctuary. Not respecting the dress code if provided.” – Eva Trevisan
• “One of the most disruptive missteps is disregarding the host’s careful planning—arriving far too late to a seated holiday dinner, adjusting place cards, or bringing an unexpected guest. These details may seem small, but they can unsettle the rhythm of the evening. Respecting the host’s thoughtful planning helps everything unfold with grace and as it was intended.” – Allison Jackson

What’s your host gift recommendation?

• “Candles or candlesticks from Issy Granger, serving pieces like a Juliska cake stand, a fabulous AERIN or Match picture frame, and, of course, everyone loves a great coffee table book from Assouline.” – Victoria Dubin and Amanda Dubin
• “I absolutely love these Girls Night Place Cards! It’s something every host can put to use someday, but allows zero pressure for the host to use them that night! – Ann Travis
• “The Baobab Collection candles are my go-to. They’re beautifully designed, they burn forever, and the location-inspired scents like Manhattan or Saint-Tropez make the gift feel personal without overthinking it.” – Emily Coyne
• “An Assouline coffee table book is always a go-to gift for me. While a bottle of wine is always welcome, it usually ends up being enjoyed during the gathering, so it does not truly become something for the host. When you choose a book, you have the opportunity to curate it with intention and show that you know the host’s interests.” – Marianna Idirin
  
• “Choose something that elevates daily ritual, like artful linens, the kind that turn even Tuesday dinners into an event or a beautiful tray, perfect for bedside, bar cart, or vanity moments. Opt for pieces that say, ‘I see your aesthetic and I respect it.'”- Eva Trevisan
• “I love choosing a gift that enhances the host’s home long after the evening ends. The AERIN Mini Candle Trio is a beautiful option—elegant, versatile, and perfect for creating a warm glow during the season. It feels luxurious without being over-the-top and is the kind of gift a host will genuinely use and appreciate.” – Allison Jackson
• “If you bring flowers, always bring something for the host to put them in, so they’re not scrambling to find a place for them.” – Marcy Blum who recommends Casa Azul’s multipurpose pitchers.
• “I like to bring something celebratory but timeless and can be used repeatedly for entertaining. I am a lover of Champagne, and these Ginori 1735 Granduca Goblets tick all of my boxes.  The most thoughtful host gifts, to me, are the ones that quietly fit into someone’s home and are at the center of every celebration.” – Michelle Rago
• “I love the Zafferano’s LED cordless table lamps with scalloped edges. I often prefer LED lamps at home (set to warm light adjustment of course) as many holiday meals are family-style, so it avoids guests reaching over candles to pass dishes.” – Carly Carey

Can you share any etiquette and advice for how to be a better guest?

• “A thoughtful guest arrives on time, reads the room, and leaves before the host feels obliged to start hinting at the end of the night.” – Stephanie Cole of Cole Drake Events
• “Choosing your plus one wisely is tremendously important. If you are invited to an event and the host generously opens the possibility for you to bring someone, it becomes your responsibility to choose a person who will truly add to the experience.” – Marianna Idirin
• “Arrive with a smile, perhaps a small hostess gift, offer to help with any preparation or clean up and fill your plate even if just to try something. Graciously compliment the meal or and or table setting, knowing how hard your hosts worked to plan a special holiday meal for you. Lastly, it is always so nice to follow up after you leave with a note and or call letting your hosts know what a wonderful time you had.” – Victoria Dubin and Amanda Dubin
• “If you’re bringing a dish, make sure it is already prepared in a serving container with proper serving utensils so the host doesn’t have to work to get your dish out and ready for everyone!” – Ann Travis
• “Thoughtful communication makes all the difference: RSVP promptly, share any dietary needs early, and follow the timing provided by the host. Once you’re there, be engaged—mix, mingle, and participate in the spirit of the evening. And always take a moment the next day to express your appreciation. Those gestures create lasting goodwill.” – Allison Jackson
• “Offer help once, but don’t insist. Compliment the effort; good hosting takes time and heart. But the best guest is whoever is my dog Callista’s favorite person at the party!” – Elizabeth Slossberg
• “Being a good guest means contributing to the good vibes of the party. That means showing up on time with a thoughtful host gift, engaging with other attendees and offering interesting conversation starters. Talk about ideas rather than people. Try using books, music, art, architecture and travel as the entry to conversation.” – Emily Campbell
• “One: put your phone away. Two: make an effort to circulate and introduce yourself to other guests. Three: send a thank you note promptly, mentioning all your favorite details.” – Leslie Price
• “Never complain about anything. If you’re a vegetarian and there’s nothing for you to eat, just eat the bread. Spend equal time talking to people on either side of you and don’t use the holidays as an overt networking opportunity.” – Marcy Blum

And with that, you’re ready to mix, mingle, and be merry.