Is It OK To Reveal a Pregnancy at a Wedding?

By Over The Moon

On Monday morning, the world learned that Prince Harry and Meghan Markle were expecting their first child next spring. Following the big reveal, a source said the couple had reportedly already shared their baby news with the royal family at Princess Eugenie’s wedding, where Meghan was photographed wearing an oversized navy Givenchy coat that sparked plenty of pregnancy speculation.

While it is easy to be thrilled for Harry and Meghan, the delivery of their baby news led to a heated text debate between Over The Moon editors about whether or not it was appropriate for them to announce her pregnancy during Princess Eugenie’s wedding weekend. (It’s clear from her tweet this morning that the mother of the bride, Sarah Ferguson, certainly wasn’t pleased with the spotlight being stolen.) Unlike wearing white, or bringing a plus one that wasn’t on the invitation, there isn’t a steadfast rule, so Over The Moon’s co-founder Alexandra Macon, OTM Senior Editor Patricia Garcia, and OTM Contributor Michelle Ruiz all weighed in on this confounding etiquette question via Slack. Below, a sample of their conversation.

Patricia Garcia: Ok, here’s my take. I think she’s probably noticeably pregnant at this point, so they probably thought it would be silly to deny talking about the obvious to the family during the wedding. They probably just confirmed what was already apparent because why else would she be wearing that huge coat? If anything she wore that coat so that people wouldn’t photograph the bump and talk about that instead of Eugenie’s wedding.

Alexandra Macon: I think she’s still incredibly svelte, no one could really tell, and it’s wrong to steal the limelight.

Michelle Ruiz: Yes, they were in a pickle time-wise. They don’t want to announce beforehand and overshadow Eugenie’s wedding—especially when their preceding wedding already overshadows it. But ultimately I am opposed to announcing pregnancies at other people’s weddings. It makes wearing white seem like a very, very minor offense

PG: If you’re not showing then definitely don’t announce it, but if you’re showing, there’s no harm in confirming the news.

MR: I don’t think she’s showing enough that it can’t be hidden.

AM: I agree.

PG: Ok, so she should’ve worn something flowy, like that Oscar de la Renta dress she wore to Celia McCorquodale’s wedding, instead of that oversized Givenchy coat.

Michelle Ruiz: She is a very very thin person. Her early bump is probably a normal person post-large sandwich bump, which in itself, may be noticeable on her! I think what they did worked, which was announce it now and kick off the tour with a bang. The matter of telling their family before they told the world was the problem. But how do you tell your family in the thick of another person’s wedding?

AM: And they were leaving very soon on tour. But still it doesn’t change the fact that the Monday after Eugenie’s wedding, people are talking about Meghan and not Eugenie.

MR: True.

PG: I remember someone announced they had gotten engaged at my wedding and I didn’t care at all. In the end, good news is happy news for everyone, right? I think I would’ve been more bothered by someone wearing white. (Ahem, looking at you Kate Middleton at Meghan Markle’s wedding.)

AM: That was pale yellow!

PG: It was very, very, pale yellow.

MR: I have a theory that if someone can upstage you at your wedding you’re doing something wrong. You should be un-upstageable.

AM: That’s always been my theory too, even though it’s a controversial take.

MR: To both your points, I think you probably shouldn’t announce your pregnancy at someone else’s wedding just as a courtesy—it’s not your day, it’s their day. But I also guess most brides are not so petty and insecure that no one else can have a life that day! My best friend’s pregnancy basically became an open secret at my wedding, and I didn’t care at all. I was thrilled for them but was also on the dance floor living the dream and reveling in the day.

PG: Yes, it’s always best to play it on the safe side and keep an early pregnancy on the DL at a wedding. But if the news gets out—say because you’re not drinking and wearing a suspiciously flowy dress—then the bride shouldn’t let someone’s happy news get in the way of her happy day. In the end, it’s just a cause for more celebration.